Maturity and aging w/ Phyllis Woodfine

Episode 37 - Maturity and aging

Transcript

:: 00:04

Welcome to mental wealth, the podcast to invest in your mind. Here I will help you make sense of your mind and behaviours, giving you the tools to have your best life. There is so much to share, so let's get into this episode and explore another great topic.

:: 00:22

Welcome to Episode 37, and in this episode, we're actually going to talk about maturity. We're going to talk about what goes on, maybe as we get older and for any of you youngsters listening in, you can either listen if you wish, or maybe there's something else that you want to listen to today. But we're gonna talk about maturity and what we can expect.

:: 00:44

Both from the mind, but also from the body, and I have brought an expert in to help me with this episode. I've brought in Phyllis Woodfine, so I'd love to welcome you Phyllis.

:: 00:55

Hi. Thanks Alison. Thanks for having me.

:: 00:58

So tell everyone a.

:: 00:59

Little bit about you, Phyllis first.

:: 01:02

So yeah. So my name's Phyllis, I'm an osteopath and also a coach, a life coach. And there are a number of other modalities that I do that I bring into my coaching, but also into the osteopathy world. And and I've been an osteopath now for coming for 22 years and as a result of that.

:: 01:21

I got into teaching, so I actually teach at 2 unis, osteopathy and around that.

:: 01:27

So my client base my patients that I see are quite varied and literally treat from zero to 97 is the oldest, oldest patient I've treated and and I see men and women. So I tend to see a lot of families and all sorts of things, so over the years.

:: 01:47

Had 30 years in body work, I've seen quite a lot of the changes that people go through.

:: 01:54

Brilliant. OK, so as I said, you're the perfect person to to share this little space with and and have a conversation.

:: 02:02

So that we can just listen in, hear, hear our conversation and then just work out what does this mean for you? For you, the listener. So I think we can talk about age in a way that hopefully feels more positive because you often hear people saying they're nervous about.

:: 02:21

Getting older, they're worried about what the future's gonna hold, and I'd love to hear your thoughts on kind of what kind of things you hear people say firstly on this topic.

:: 02:32

Yeah, a lot of the ageing side of things people because obviously as an osteopath, they come and see me because more often than not they've had either an injury or they've got some sort of aching pain, aches and pains, and you often hear them saying that, well, I'm getting old. So you know what?

:: 02:51

What can you expect?

:: 02:53

And I then as a result, often say to them, well, some of these things are because we're ageing. But it doesn't mean that we're aged and that we have to stop doing what we're doing. We just might need to adapt that, we might need to change some of the things that we're doing and it might well be that.

:: 03:14

You know, in our 20s, we recovered really quickly after an injury, an incident, whatever. And in our 40s, we might take a little bit longer to do.

:: 03:24

That and then in our 60s, again, it might be a little bit longer, but that doesn't mean that we can't recover from things. And I think you know, you work with the mind. I do as such in that it is.

:: 03:39

How we think about what's happening with ourselves, if you put yourself in that mindset of I'm no longer.

:: 03:45

Able to do this is as.

:: 03:47

A result of the ageing, you know that sort of thing. It's a bit like you becoming what you said you are. Ohh, I'm no good at this or whatever. I'm old. I'm whatever. Well, then you're gonna become that.

:: 03:59

And if you start changing.

:: 04:02

The narrative, the way you talk about things, you you actually will start to feel different. And I always say that when people come to see me.

:: 04:13

The body of of belief, of and one of the ethos around osteopathy is that the body has its own self healing mechanism.

:: 04:22

Sometimes we'll have injuries and stuff and they will get better, but they might take a little bit.

:: 04:27

Longer and what an osteopath will do is they're gonna help you to move that along a little bit. Yeah. And it's the same with ageing. Yeah. You're gonna have effects, but there are things that you can do that can help it so that it isn't necessarily that big, nasty thing.

:: 04:43

I mean, I'm happy to say how old I am when I talk to people and they're ohh really.

:: 04:49

You know, and I just think well.

:: 04:51

I'm not gonna stop.

:: 04:52

You know, until I'm forced to stop and yes, I'm 6 feet under or.

:: 04:56

Whatever you know. So I.

:: 04:58

Love that.

:: 04:59

I think it is so important, isn't it, to catch yourself just listening to the language that we use about these things, about the way we describe ourselves about the way we describe each day. You know, I'm quite a fan of really thinking about how do you want to be today rather than worrying about too far ahead in the future.

:: 05:19

Or dwelling on the past. And I think, you know, age is is is exactly the same. I mean, yes, we it's a it's a it's.

:: 05:26

A number literally.

:: 05:28

Isn't it? I mean, I'm also happy to talk about how old I am, you know? So I think it's it's important that we just catch ourselves and just check, you know, if you are using language that isn't serving you and it's going to make things worse.

:: 05:43

Totally. And it's sort of like that confidence around what you're doing and what you're saying and certainly being aware, I think sometimes we forget that actually with age and maturity comes.

:: 05:57

Which might not necessarily have wisdom, but it comes knowledge we've moved along. You know, we've seen a lot of things as you get older. You had, you know, unless you've been in, you know, places that you know, you can't get out and about. We've seen things. We've got experience and that that we need to look at as.

:: 06:17

A confidence base and I think you know, yes, we will possibly get slightly more aches and pains, but that shouldn't stop us. I'm often saying to.

:: 06:28

To to our patient my patients that you know if you have got sort of that joint pain then what you don't wanna do is give in to it for want of a better word you wanna keep moving because you want the blood to keep flowing around you want the you you know you want the joints to be perfused keep up your.

:: 06:49

Your water intake, you know, you wanna really just.

:: 06:53

Do as much as you can to help things along and recognise that yes, it might change a little bit when you get older, but that doesn't mean it has to stop. You can do things to help yourself along, and even if that means that you can no longer do the marathon running that you used to do.

:: 07:13

And that actually is again, that's a mind thing, because if you really wanna do it, it can, you know, how many of those 80 year olds have we seen or 70 year olds who suddenly take up running and whatever, you know, you can the mind is an incredible thing.

:: 07:29

If you do, you know you can't find. You can't do those things and but then maybe go walking instead of the running and walk at speed. You know it's adapting what you do, but not seeing it as a negative, seeing that positive around around the fact that well, look, I'm still able to move, I'm still able to do this.

:: 07:49

I might not have done this yet, but I can do it now.

:: 07:53

I think you raise a really good point that, you know, we're we're we're not saying you have to stop. We're absolutely saying check your mind check the way that you think the way that you talk but I think something that I've seen quite a lot.

:: 08:07

For people who maybe were very active, yeah. And then maybe they've had an injury or an illness or something like ME or something that's really slowed them down. Fibromyalgia type of symptoms and it slowed them down. And one of their most challenging things to do is to accept that.

:: 08:27

Even though we're saying you don't have to stop, there are things that you might have to do differently.

:: 08:33

And I think that is something that people really struggle with so suddenly. I can't get fit anymore. I've put some weight on. I feel really stiff. What then can they do to to do something? Because I think that's where people get really low in mood and really frustrated with themselves.

:: 08:53

I think for me one of the tips around that is looking at the fact that.

:: 08:59

You are here and now there's no point in looking back because that's actually not going to serve you. I mean that, you know, as a coach, that's very much. We're always looking forward, but it's it's also looking at like where am I now? What is it that I want to do and how can I make that happen and it's.

:: 09:19

Not looking back to well, I used to. Well, yeah. You used to do something, but OK, you're here now.

:: 09:26

Accept where you are and acceptance. So I mean, I don't know. I I've done an acceptance commitment therapy. That's not saying I'm accepting. So now I'm just gonna sit here and not do anything it's recognising this is what's happened. Being realistic about that. OK. This is where I am. What's my one step?

:: 09:46

That's gonna move me forward.

:: 09:48

In this place that I am now, how can

:: 09:51

I move forward from that.

:: 09:51

And I'm always talking to people about that one step. It is one thing that you need to do because one step means that you can probably get that second.

:: 09:58

Step afterwards but.

:: 10:00

You need to make that one step, but if you're doing that one step backwards, it's not gonna get you.

:: 10:04

Anywhere it's the.

:: 10:05

:: 10:05

Step forward and it is really accepting where you are at the moment.

:: 10:09

But recognising that doesn't mean that you can't move forward, and certainly I've had patients and coaching clients who've had ME, who I've treated a lot of people with fibromyalgia.

:: 10:24

And it's gonna be very different for every person. You can't. You know, it's really difficult to be generic around these things. And I don't think one should. And you know, and that's one of the things with osteopathy and with coaching.

:: 10:36

You're coaching the individual.

:: 10:40

As an individual, you're.

:: 10:42

Gonna look at what's happening to you because you.

:: 10:45

Can never walk in.

:: 10:45

Anybody else's shoes? No matter what it is, you're not walking in their shoes.

:: 10:50

It's recognising I'm here. What can I do to change those things?

:: 10:55

I think so. I mean it it just it's that relationship as as ever with your mind and then listening to your body, isn't it? And then it's kind of that balancing act all the time with what am I thinking about this you know I I love the point you've raised about. There's no point in keep saying well, I used to be a runner.

:: 11:13

Or I used to cycle or. I used to this I used to that. You know. Yeah, that's true. You maybe you used to, but what are you going to do because like you say, giving up to everything is is doing going to do nothing but make you feel miserable. And I see people who.

:: 11:30

Have you know are in that sort of halfway house where they have had to give something up, maybe for an injury, maybe for age, maybe for something different, and then they haven't quite got their heads around it. And I think, you know, again, obviously this podcast is called mental wealth. You know, how can you get the best out of your mind?

:: 11:51

So that you can.

:: 11:52

Have the best that you can and I know you see loads of people who probably are in that space.

:: 11:57

Yeah. Yeah. And I think you know, when you as we're getting older.

:: 12:03

You know, sometimes we're gonna have those moments when we do have the uh, what if and or I remember you can't. You know, I find myself sometimes being a bit ageist, you know? And you'll be talking to somebody about and.

:: 12:16

I saw.

:: 12:18

You know that policeman's like a child. You know, because they look so young and stuff like that, and that's.

:: 12:23

But that's putting yourself in.

:: 12:26

In a place that, yeah, you might momentarily go through that, but don't stay in that place. Not resenting the fact that they're young and you're not, you know, it's recognising that, OK. But they're gonna have to go through a very, you know, all sorts of things that you've probably already been through.

:: 12:47

And also I think for me it's really being positive in terms of.

:: 12:53

Well, actually it's quite a privilege to get to this point that I'm at. I've had friends who've died at a young age, you know, who've not made it to where I am. So every year I celebrate. I'm here, I'm with my patients and with the coaching clients, you know, I don't know what it's like to have fibromyalgia.

:: 13:13

I know what it's like to have other conditions. I don't know what it's like to be 80, but I certainly know what it's like to have a hip problem because I used to be a sports person.

:: 13:22

So you know now I'm gonna need the hip replacement. So I know where I am. That doesn't mean that I know what you're going through. But what I can say to you is.

:: 13:33

If you don't dwell on that and look at what are the positives, what is it that you want to do as opposed to what you can't do, then that's gonna enable you to move forward. If we dwell on what we want to do and can do and how we might be able to do it, that's gonna serve us a lot better.

:: 13:53

Than thinking, what if what if?

:: 13:57

I think that's so important and I think something else that springs to my mind.

:: 14:01

They sometimes we all find ourselves occasionally into space where we know we're not doing the right things for ourselves.

:: 14:11

And we're not doing it. So we know we're not doing it and we're not doing it. And that sort of cycle, you know, maybe you do need to maybe you know that you need to go and see Someone Like You. Phyllis. Yeah, maybe. You know, you need to go and have physio maybe, you know that you've got some condition that you are ignoring or not paying attention to. And in that space where we're.

:: 14:32

Ignoring and not doing.

:: 14:34

It's quite a lot of the time. There's some self beating in that space where you kind of know you should be, but you're not. And then that becomes an issue. And I I always think that things like that become a weight on top of what you've already got to deal with.

:: 14:48

Totally, totally. And if we look at around how our mind works and how we get stressed by things and get anxious if we're in that space, neuroscience will, you know, the science is there to show us that.

:: 15:06

Actually, it's not surprising we can't make decisions and we can't make forward, you know, move forward. So we have to find a way of trying to break that cycle and that would be one of my tips around that is that, you know, breathing can be it sounds stupid. But you know, when you remember as a child, I remember my mum saying -

:: 15:26

OK, take a breath and actually.

:: 15:30

Again, the science backs it up. Neuroscience backs it up. If we take a breath, if we do something like as simple as box breathing or just taking a breath in and letting that breath go down to the belly and weight, that just starts to calm down the nervous system and allows our brain to then start.

:: 15:50

Thinking of what it is we can do, yeah, but if we're constantly in that cycle of being stressful, running, you know, like the hamster on the wheel, and we can't find that space. So taking that breath is what's gonna help us find a little bit of a chunk.

:: 16:08

In there to move forward Umm and that really for me applies in so many things, and that's to men, women, children. It doesn't make any difference. And one of the things that I deal a lot with is the menopause. And again, that's something that some women have that the anxiousness that comes with it and it's one of the things.

:: 16:27

That I talked to them about.

:: 16:29

Is taking that breath and really trying to take a little bit of time out just for you even?

:: 16:35

Just for a minute.

:: 16:37

Because we've all got a minute.

:: 16:39

Yeah, I know. And that's that's the crazy thing that we sort of forget that we've got these minutes and and I'm often using the breath as a as a reminder, you know it's like you say it sounds so crazy that we need to remember that that is a powerful tool of which you'll you've always got with you. You have to remember it. You don't have to put it in your bag.

:: 16:59

You don't have to. It's they're always there and it does calm the nervous system down in the mind and everything. But I think something I I want to come back to menopause for this in a moment. But I think something that I also feel that you've touched on and I want to highlight it.

:: 17:14

That when we talk about age and we talk about, you know, not wanting to get old, which obviously is not even a thing because every day we are getting older.

:: 17:26

But I think you do hear a lot of people say I might ask people.

:: 17:33

You know, do you still worry about what people are saying about you? Do you worry about comparing yourself to others? Do you worry about the future and quite often.

:: 17:45

People will say I used to do that, but since I've got older I do less of it and that's got to be something that we've got to celebrate, even if we're in, maybe not quite as nimble as we used to be.

:: 17:59

Totally that and that goes back to what I'm saying. We've been there. We've done, yeah, stuff. And you do get to that point where it is, do you know what? That doesn't bother me as much. I don't. I don't need you to be my best friend. I don't need you to love me. I don't need to get that done perfectly. And certainly that is something that I see that.

:: 18:21

That definitely.

:: 18:22

As we get older, sometimes depending on what we're doing, you know, if you're getting into a new venture or something, it might be slightly different, but definitely your reactions to it change as we're getting older and I see that all the time. I agree with you, yeah.

:: 18:34

You guys are awesome.

:: 18:37

Yeah, but I think we need to celebrate that, don't we? Rather than living this sort of dread of ohh gosh, it's all you know, people talk about. It's all going South and.

:: 18:45

It's all all.

:: 18:46

The things that people say about getting older and yeah, we we haven't. We're not gonna have 20 year old bodies for sure. But but what have we got?

:: 18:55

Yeah, yeah.

:: 18:56

And I and for me, really homing in on that because we can't change the rest, it it it is what it is. But what we can do is be really.

:: 19:07

Mindful about the fact that, you know, I've got all this knowledge, I've got all this wisdom. I've got all this freeing stuff that maybe you didn't have when you were younger.

:: 19:17

Yeah, yeah, I totally. And it's celebrating that and recognising and this might be one of the occasions.

:: 19:25

Where I say yeah.

:: 19:26

You can look back, look back to what you.

:: 19:27

Were like at.

:: 19:28

20 look back to what you were like when you.

:: 19:31

Were that?

:: 19:32

You know, teenager going through puberty.

:: 19:35

Or when you know.

:: 19:36

You were looking forward to your 40th birthday and what was going to your head at that stage. You know, all of those things and it's and it's not saying that, you know, 60 is the new 40 or whatever it is. I I don't wanna be faulty again necessarily but it's celebrating.

:: 19:53

The fact that.

:: 19:54

Actually, I'm at this stage now and look how much more I've got.

:: 19:59

As a result of those years.

:: 20:01

That have gone on.

:: 20:03

And you know, so I might not be able to fit into the clothes that I did when.

:: 20:08

I was 20.

:: 20:08

But really, who cares? Do you really want to be wearing the same things that you were then? No.

:: 20:13

Not really, but.

:: 20:14

I feel like we're almost balancing then, aren't we? So it's physically things might be changing, but we can balance it nicely with the growth that we've had. The development.

:: 20:25

I'm not the same person. Literally not the same person that I was. I would not be having a podcast when I was younger, you know?

:: 20:32

Yeah, that's it.

:: 20:32

No way, you know, no.

:: 20:34

And it and it is. It's celebrating that. I mean, look how amazing. Look at the amazing things that you've done by having that podcast of people you've had, the other people you've been able to help through that, that you weren't doing when you were younger. And it's and it is really looking at those things and recognising them for how positive they are.

:: 20:54

And it really is celebrating that.

:: 20:58

I think so. I think so. So while I've got you here, Phyllis, I think let's come back to you mentioned you work with a lot of people with men and lots of ladies with menopause.

:: 21:07

It's not something I specialise in at all, but I would love to just put a little bit of something for anyone listening in today to may be in this space or heading for this space or whatever we want to call it.

:: 21:21

Yeah. Yeah, so very much. It's at around perimenopause and menopause. And the fact that, you know, a lot of women don't necessarily realise that that's what they're going through. And and they might well be, you know, they might have gone to their doctors saying, I'm feeling a little bit down or whatever. And they have ended up being put on antidepressants.

:: 21:41

Or they might have had a blood test and the doctor.

:: 21:43

Said, well, you know, you know all.

:: 21:45

Their healthcare physician has said yeah, but it doesn't show that, you know, you're not going through the menopause. The reality of it is that it's a fluctuation of those hormones. So one blood test isn't gonna tell you it's a combination of all the the different symptoms.

:: 22:01

Which again are many and varied.

:: 22:04

But it's I usually say to people try and keep a diary. Regardless, they come to me and they're saying about their mood being a bit down and they'll keep a diary of when these things happen and you can see whether or not it is a regular.

:: 22:16

Thing or whether or not it's just because you're going through a stressful time, you know, at the moment. And the reality is that if you're going through.

:: 22:26

The menopause, particularly in your maybe in your 40s, fifties then that you might have aged parents, you might have your teenage kids who are giving you ranks, that there's so many other things that are going on.

:: 22:37

I think it is just trying to be aware of those things, but recognising that it is just another part of life and.

:: 22:46

A bit like we were saying beforehand, celebrate that I'm moving on to.

:: 22:50

The next stage?

:: 22:52

But yeah, it is. It's many and varied. It's too much to go into on this today is the what it could be

:: 22:58

:: 22:58

:: 22:59

But it's just recognising that it is.

:: 23:01

You know, much as you went through puberty. It's that we're going through another stage of those hormone changes. The difference is actually we're a lot wiser. We're a lot older. We've got a lot of experience. But the things that you can do for yourself is being kind to yourself, trying not to do that.

:: 23:22

Beating yourself up over what's going.

:: 23:24

And trying to find space within it and it is going back to that breath again. You know, that's one of the things that I teach on my course is talking about how we breathe and using that and that mindfulness and being just a little bit taking a little bit of stock, taking a time out.

:: 23:43

I love that I love your suggestion around. Just keeping a little handle on I'm. I'm a big fan of people writing things down. I've created a a three month journal which just helps people pause and just think about their day. And I think just.

:: 23:58

Making sure that you are being a kind to yourself. But secondly just see what else is going on for you because we can so quickly just label something as ohh it's this and actually then you go down a path trying to find that solution to that thing.

:: 24:15

:: 24:16

And and actually.

:: 24:18

It's lots of other things that are causing you to feel like that, and I think so many people do, you know, I mean, I'm.

:: 24:23

I'm not a.

:: 24:24

Big fan of labels. You know, I've got a background in the NHS as a therapist and you know, sometimes people would come and say I've got social anxiety.

:: 24:32

You know and.

:: 24:33

Then everything would be about.

:: 24:35

This the social anxiety. I can't go here. I I don't like people. I don't like groups and all these things, and it almost feels like you're sort of hiding behind that. And I'm not disrespecting people's conditions at all. But I think just being really observant about.

:: 24:51

What is going on for you at this time and I see a lot of women, particularly who are doing too much for others not asking for their needs, not putting themselves forward, not feeling able to speak up, and I think.

:: 25:08

All of that is is going to affect your your overall outcome in life, isn't it so?

:: 25:16

To to to just put.

:: 25:17

A label on ohh I've I'm I've.

:: 25:19

Got the menopause? It it. It's possibly a lot more than that. And for me, I think a lot of women get to that stage in their life and they do.

:: 25:27

Realise that they've.

:: 25:29

Done running around too much and they haven't asked for their things and and that's got to have an impact somewhere.

:: 25:38

Yeah, and it does. And I think it's no matter what is going on. You have to try and find that space for you and.

:: 25:49

If there's one tip that I would give, is find a small bit of space for you that you put yourself at the top of the list.

:: 25:58

:: 26:00

Because stereotypical as it may sound, most women are at the bottom of.

:: 26:04

Their lists, regardless of whether or not they have kids, they don't have kids. They're in a relationship. They're not in a relationship. They put themselves at the bottom of the list, and I've seen it all the time. And all I'm saying to you.

:: 26:18

Is just try.

:: 26:20

Couple of times a week to put yourself at the top of the list and actually the difference that can make is absolutely amazing.

:: 26:29

Brilliant. And that, what a brilliant tip. If we could all just take that one space just to say, do you know what I'm gonna do this for me today or I'm and or I'm not gonna do that for that other person. It can just be the glue, can't it? Phyllis. It can just be the bit that makes because, you know, we are all dealing with this physical body.

:: 26:50

We are all dealing with.

:: 26:51

These things that we've talked about already and yet just that difference by just taking some time and for me, it's not just about going for a massage or having one night sleep. You know, it's like it's consistently putting yourself somewhere a bit higher up in your.

:: 27:08

Yeah. And that and then that is why I say put yourself at the top of the list a couple of times a week because the reality is you're probably not gonna do it every single day. But if you take a week and think 2 times out of a week, I'm gonna be at the top of my list.

:: 27:22

That's gonna have a change, and that might then make you actually put yourself at the top.

:: 27:27

Of the list all of the week because you recognise that it is that you can't fill from an empty cup, and if your cup gets fuller and fuller, it's a lot easier to deal with the other things that are going on. But you gotta start somewhere you gotta.

:: 27:40

Make that one step.

:: 27:41

Yeah, I love.

:: 27:42

That, and I think for me, I'm often reminding people that, you know, if you're gonna put something new in, it's two things that spring to mind. One, you have got to feel the benefit yourself first for you to realise that maybe repeating it cause somebody saying you need to.

:: 27:55

Do that. Yeah, you know.

:: 27:56

We we hear people saying all the time, don't we? You know, we've got to do more self-care.

:: 28:00

But until you personally realise that actually that does help you both mentally, emotionally, physically.

:: 28:07

But the other side that I think is important is let's not pretend that if you suddenly do start putting yourself a little bit higher, there could be for a little while a bit of a fallout. Yeah, there might be some people who are like, I can't believe that you're going to. What do you mean you're not going to do that thing that you've always done every single week you're going to do something.

:: 28:27

Different so sometimes.

:: 28:28

We have to be a bit brave.

:: 28:30

We have to be. If you've been in a cycle where you.

:: 28:32

Haven't put yourself forward, which means.

:: 28:34

Your body and your mind are not as strong as they could be. There may be a little fall out.

:: 28:39

Yeah. Yeah. And it's being brave. As you said there and being strong to keep going with it so that you can then see the benefits of it. And you can see look that it was worth doing that because look where I am now.

:: 28:55

How much I can enjoy where I am now.

:: 28:57

:: 28:58

I love that.

:: 28:59

So we've got some really simple but very powerful tips for our conversation today. Phyllis, we've got the breath, let's not remember. Let's remember. Rather, let's remember how powerful that is just in any moment. But whatever is going on for you.

:: 29:14

We all obviously want to make sure that we think about our minds, don't we, about how do we think about ageing and and changing and what can we do differently. And then the other thing that I think is really important that we've highlighted is to to be OK with the fact that it's a bit different.

:: 29:33

The fact that it it looks different would you want to highlight anything else, Phyllis?

:: 29:37

Yeah. I mean, I think those are the probably the, the the biggest points there that it it it's not like it used to be and it won't be and actually that's not a bad thing but it is taking that time out to give yourself.

:: 29:52

Space to get that clarity, and also remembering actually you've got every right to be confident in what you're doing cause you've learned it, you've got you've you've got the stripes. You've been there. Take that one step.

:: 30:04

I love that I love.

:: 30:06

I love that and and you're right. You know, we you said earlier about seeing people out there who are in their 80s and just doing the most remarkable things, you know, I think for me, I'm so inspired by that. You know, I I aim to be an 80 year old who's still doing stuff but it. But you have to work at.

:: 30:25

Work at that it doesn't just come, does it. You know, people often say ohh well, it's it was easy for them because yeah, it wasn't easy for them because they've worked hard.

:: 30:34

Yeah, yeah, totally. And it is that it's keep working at it. I've always, you know, I've people saying, oh, my gosh, well, if you're doing another course and it's just like, well, I'm keeping my brain going cause one, I really enjoy doing it. And two, it means I can help others cause I can give them the benefit of some of the experience that I've got. But it also means that.

:: 30:54

Being around others, I'm learning stuff all the time and.

:: 30:59

You know, I hope to keep that.

:: 31:00

Brain going as much as I can and.

:: 31:03

And be excited by things. And I think that's probably.

:: 31:08

One of the final tips I'd say is do things that make you excited.

:: 31:14

I love that. Yeah, I love.

:: 31:16

That it's almost there going back, isn't it? You know, to the.

:: 31:20

Child go and do that thing that makes you smile or go and jump in that puddle. You know, that's something else that I see, you know, with with maturity is that people then sort of seem to think that they've got to be all sensible.

:: 31:35

Exactly. If we're gonna, if we're gonna face this. Uh, second, uh, next generation. Uh, not generation. What, what's the word I want, next chapter in our lives. Let's let's jump in with all both feet.

:: 31:49

Yeah, let's jump in that puddle and splash about definite.

:: 31:52

Yeah. Because we do take ourselves too seriously quite often as adults.

:: 31:56

Oh my gosh. Yeah.

:: 31:57

Yeah, yeah, definitely, I think.

:: 31:58

Affects it ohh fellas it's been absolutely lovely sharing this this this space and this episode with you today.

:: 32:05

Thank you. I've.

:: 32:06

Really enjoyed it. It's been lovely chatting.

:: 32:08

Brilliant and all your links in our show notes. So if anybody wants to look fill this up please please do.

:: 32:18

Thank you for listening and sharing in this episode of Mental Wealth. Remember, you can subscribe wherever you get your podcast. My last question to you is, what is the one small thing that you can take action on from this episode?

:: 32:35

Message me on Instagram or through our website with questions you'd like me.

:: 32:39

To explore.

:: 32:40

You'll find the links in the show.

:: 32:42

Tips. I'll be back with more tools and tips to make sense of your mind in the next episode. In the meantime, be kind to yourself. Bye for now.