Episode 26
Patience w/ Naomi Holbrook
Welcome to episode 26 of the Mental Wealth podcast!
In this episode, we're going to really drill down on patience and how it can play out, how useful it is, but also the opposite to that. We uncover the science behind patience and its impact on mental well-being. Exploring effective strategies to cultivate patience and improve productivity. Joining me on the podcast, I am delighted to say that I'm joined by a very special guest - Naomi Holbrook.
Naomi is an International Transformational Midlife Mentor, certified Nutrition & Weight Management Coach and best selling co-author who's passion is Empowering Women to create the BEST second half of their life
After some turbulent & traumatic teenage years during and after her Mum's premature death Naomi went on to create a successful 21 year career for herself in the Luxury Hospitality & Wellness Industry
From the age of 39 she transformed her own life from clinically obese, battling chronic pain, chronic illness & clinical depression to become the happiest, healthiest and most fulfilled version of herself that she is now
Her personal background in overcoming obstacles, building resilience and creating her own confidence and self belief have made her become a go-to in the wellness industry for inspiring & empowering other midlife women to follow suit and go onto create and live the lives they always dreamed of
She became an Amazon Bestselling Co-Author in March 2022, has been published in various UK publications; Health & Wellbeing, Natural Health, iNews, Marie Claire and is in the process of writing her first book which will be published Autumn 2024.
Hope you enjoy!
https://www.instagram.com/naomi_midlife_mentor/
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Transcript
Episode 26 - Patience
Transcript
::Welcome to mental wealth, the podcast to invest in your mind. Here I will help you make sense of your mind and behaviours, giving you the tools to have your best life. There is so much to share, so let's get into this episode and explore another great topic.
::So welcome to episode 26. And in this episode, we're going to really drill down on patients and how it can play out, how useful it is, but also the opposite to that, and with me to create this episode, I am delighted to say that I'm joined by a very special guest.
::Naomi Holbrook, so welcome to this episode.
::Thank you so much, Allison. Lovely to be here with you on.
::Your podcast.
::Brilliant. So tell everyone a little bit about who Naomi is first.
::Yeah. So my name is Naomi Holbrook. As you just said, I am the midlife transformation mentor.
::I'm a certified nutrition and weight management coach and I help women in mid life to revolutionise their health, happiness and hormones.
::Brilliant. So we've definitely got a good expert in the room and before we started recording, we were just sharing that our own journeys are part of our work, aren't they? And I'm very keen to talk.
::About that and.
::I know you've probably got some things we can share, but I think.
::If we keep in mind.
:: deliveries the next day even: ::And when we?
::Think about things like confidence and self worth and self belief. We cannot have that overnight.
::No, absolutely not. And it has taken me the best part of nine years to figure out a lot of the answers behind why I never got to where I wanted to get to, why I wasn't able to free myself of depression earlier on, why I wasn't able to take control of my health. And you're right that you know in.
::The society that we live in now, we expect everything at.
::The push of.
::A button we, you know, can get whatever we want whenever we want, and we want that instant gratification, and we're not really prepared and we don't really understand that. Actually, there's a lot of work behind the scenes and it takes time to get to.
::Wherever it is that we're wanting to get to, it takes time to get to that goal.
::And and I think this well is time.
::We need to think about what we get along the way, don't we? Because there's.
::So much, and I think that's where some people.
::Get a bit.
::Fatigued because they they it's happening quick enough. It's not coming. It's not coming, but actually sometimes in that moment.
::There are.
::Other information, the fact it doesn't come quickly, we have to learn.
::About resilience about patients, which is our main theme for today. And I think it's so important, isn't it for us just to be able to think about what that might look like and how do we manage when we want.
::It today so tell everyone a little bit more about your experience. You've hinted that you took some time and me too. It took me years to get to where I am today.
::Absolutely. And and I just want to quickly sort of hone back in on what you said there cause that is just so important and I didn't I didn't realise that part until the last couple of years that everything I did was sort of goal orientated and I didn't focus on the process and the journey. It was always about the outcome. So if I didn't get to.
::The outcome and the goal.
::Quick enough, I felt like I'd.
::Failed, but actually this last couple of years learning resilience, learning patience, all those different things you actually learn so much more about yourself in the process, but also you, you know, you learn other tools and other strategies, maybe they're not the ones that you thought you were going to learn. Maybe they're.
::Not the ones that you, you know, necessarily set out to.
::But if you are.
::So tunnel vision on that one.
::Goal in that one outcome you don't learn all the other things along the way.
::La falla.
::And that's that's.
::That you've highlighted that again, I think it's important for us.
::To say that.
::Yeah, a perfect example. This year I failed at a huge goal that I had set and that was to climb Mount Blanc at the end of August I trained for sort of 7-8 months with a team. We went out there and we didn't manage to summit and it was really quite ironic. I phoned my dad when we got back down that that day and I said.
::Listen, I just need to let you know we didn't make it.
::And it was so interesting. The first words that came out of his mouth. What a waste of nine months of my training.
::And I got a little louder, I said was.
::Not at all. Nothing has been a waste.
::I have learned.
::More about myself in this process. In this nine months I have grown.
::Groaning confidence grown in belief, grown in every single area. I've probably got more from the knockbacks in the journey than I would have done from the final summit, so it just goes to show that we, you know, we still are a lot in that mindset of if you don't achieve a goal, you failed.
::And what a waste of your time to, you know, to go through that process. But for me, it was the, the the greatest learning like you say, of resilience, of patience, of confidence, of belief, of all those different things.
::I love that and well done for even tackling something like that. I mean, I think that's sort of.
::Challenge is something to be honoured in its space, so for me it isn't like you say always about the end goal. It's about what happened for you to get there. It's interesting that you say that Naomi because in a couple of weeks I'm interviewing an amazing young person called Mel Kelly and she and I did the Yorkshire Three Peaks and we talked about.
::The the whole.
::Process of actually going and doing something like that. So to me well done for even putting yourself in that place in the 1st place as you say.
::You gained anyway.
::Yeah, brilliant. OK, so tell everyone a little bit more about what you've learned or how do you want to share this bit of your story, Naomi?
::Would be brilliant.
::I suppose you know, but.
::Like we were chatting before, it makes sense.
::To, you know, give a little bit of understanding and background behind the transformation that I've gone through. You know, as a as a young girl, I battled with poor body image. I struggled with my mental health, didn't realise it back then because, you know, in the in the 80s that wasn't talked about, but I really.
::Struggled at school. I had a lot of, you know, kind of childhood illness, asthma, all those different things. That meant I had lots of periods of time off of school, which I really struggled then with catching up with, you know, low self-confidence.
::And sadly, my mum became chronically ill when I was only 12 and a dreadful, dreadful 7 year illness and passed away when I was a teenager. It had a profound effect on me, my mental health, but also my physical health. I, you know, turned to comfort of food and.
::Alcohol from a, you know teenager through my 20s, my 30s and through myself into a 21 year career at the age of 19.
::And and at 39 I was clinically obese, I was prediabetic. I had the worst depression anxiety on the outside. I was this confident woman because I put on this daily mask and, you know, kind of acted that everything was absolutely great. But inside.
::I was in constant turmoil.
::Just you know, negative thoughts, conversations with myself, really. You know, harsh conversations and at 39, literally four days after I turned 39, I was like, I just don't want to be like this at 40. I want to change. I want to do things differently. So my transformation started off as a physical one.
::Thought you know I need to lose weight and when I lose weight I'll be happy and I'll get rid of depression and everything will be perfect in my life and and you know my 40th year I was a size 10 and I'd lost all this, you know, 4 1/2 stone of weight. And I was my fittest, my healthiest.
::But my mental health was still dreadful and my mindset was still dreadful and I couldn't figure out why. Why am I not happy? I'm, you know, I've. I've lost all this weight. I'm kind of where I plan to be. And there I go talking about the goal of getting there and and then four years ago, I guess I started my.
::Dinner transformation I started to work on my mindset. I started to work on my beliefs. I started to work on.
::Old behaviours on trauma, on all the things that had stopped me in this place of being. This woman with low self-confidence and lacking belief in herself and, you know, even the very fact that I signed up to do this huge, you know, this huge goal this year of climbing Mont Blanc.
::I wouldn't have even dreamt of it four years ago. Three years ago, two years ago. So I guess the transformation became, in the end a holistic transformation. I thought it was all about the external transformation, the loss.
::Weight. But then what? I realised it was actually I needed to work on my mental, my physical, my emotional and my spiritual well-being. And that's, you know, that's why I created my unique smart formula that I now use with my clients inside my transformation programmes to help to work on all those different aspects to.
::Thrive in midlife. To have you know, optimal physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being.
::Brilliant. Thank you for sharing so much of that because think just people hearing others talk about their challenges is so important, isn't it? And one of the biggest?
::Reasons for me creating this podcast is so that we don't feel less alone when we're listening in.
::But I think something else that really stands out for me when you describe the need and it is a need for us to look at all aspects of mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, as you say, absolutely, 100%, do we then need to roll in the patients because.
::We are going to need to.
::Work out lots of the house.
::And I often talk about it being like a jigsaw, and there's lots and lots and lots of pieces of the jigsaw. And how do we do a jigsaw? We can only do it one piece at a time. So being able to keep our mind on that, how do we do patience, what might that look like for each person listening in today? Because it might be different. But what is it that?
::Either gets in the way of patients. Is it the mind? Is it the results aren't there? What might it be? I think just listening.
::To us talking today, hopefully we'll just help people see that they've gotta keep going, but the skill is to find which way to go, isn't it? And be patient. And I think something else that we I think we should touch on Naomi is that when you do have a.
::Little set back.
::Only see it as a set back. Or is it a learn? Is there something great and what? What would you?
::Say for that.
::Ohh, absolutely. You're you're speaking my language. First of all, one thing I always say to ladies in midlife is do you feel like you've dropped the jigsaw puzzle and you've lost the box with the picture and?
::They're like, oh, my gosh, yes, that.
::Fit. So it is that feeling like you say of you've got to put the pieces back together one by one, but you've also got to know, like, at least you've got to know the.
::Kind of the.
::Main key for corners first before you can.
::Put those other.
::Pieces back in and I think absolutely like you just said there, learning that resilience and.
::Patience along the way, and what I would say.
::It's it's a, it's. It's not easy to get into this mindset because as you know most, you know, most of us are in a fixed mindset unless we have the tools and the strategies to grow ourselves into that growth mindset. And I realise now that I was 100% in a fixed mindset, which is why I gave up every time I failed why I told myself I'd tried.
::Everything I always say to my clients.
::Embrace the process. Embrace the messiness. Embrace the hiccups, the challenges, the obstacles, because they are all a part of the lesson and you can't see it at the time and you do get frustrated. But when you get to the other side or you get through it, you kind of look back and go.
::Ah, that's what it was telling me. That's what the lesson was. I can do that easily now, when something doesn't go to plan or, you know, or a challenge comes up.
::I can really.
::Easily now kind of just ride through it and know that you know it's meant to be and that's what's going to happen without it sounding.
::Kind of all woo.
::Woo. But that's really difficult when you're in a fixed mindset. So I think what I what you know what?
::Advice I'd give to your listeners is.
::Almost think of it like.
::The roller coaster.
::Hold tight when you get to those moments, because then you're gonna get this incredible view you're gonna get to the top of the roller coaster, but you've got to be prepared for those ups and downs. There is no goal that you will achieve that's achieved through a linear process.
::It's all going to be ups and downs and and part of climbing a mountain this year, not when everybody said to me why on Earth have you said that as a goal? I was like because life is full of mountains we have to climb, you know, and literally clamber our way up in life sometimes.
::But if you do push yourself through.
::This incredible view at the top and you get to feel this incense, you know, this intense sense of pride and and all.
::Those other things.
::So I think my biggest thing is.
::Embrace it. Embrace the messiness of going after your goals. But I think, especially for women, I know that this does does apply to men, cause I've had.
::Men reach out to me.
::And tell me this as well, but I think we are striving for this perfectionism that doesn't exist. And so when we're not perfect, we fail. And I always say to my clients.
::It's a bit like having a puncture and then going around and slashing.
::The other three tyres.
::Just fix the puncture and get back on the road and stop derailing your, you know, stop self sabotaging all the results when you could just have had the minor blip and got back on and got back on towards the journey.
::All of that, I think it's so important, isn't it? Like you said before, we need the bigger goal. But then in, in between, we need these teeny, tiny things, and they're celebratory. We can celebrate each one of those little, teeny, tiny things. And I think as well, it's really important for you to have highlight.
::Did this you know that it is? It's gonna be straightforward life, isn't it? It shouldn't be. And I and I use the word should rarely, because obviously you should. It's often one of our challenges, but actually it shouldn't be easy. It should be a bit difficult, you know, if you are very comfortable, then you're not pushing yourself in any space. You're allowed to have comfortable times.
::But what's next? And I think running parallel feels to me like we just need to be having that patience. And what might that look like is that self-care, is that gentleness, is that what is it? What else is your patience? What other kind of things do you hear people saying or do you?
::Yourself. Would you put in into the patients department?
::Yeah. For me, self compassion. I we are so quick to berate ourselves to have such.
::You know, horrible conversations with ourselves. And I always say with my clients, you know, speak to yourself like you would your 8 year old self or speak to yourself like you would your best friend. Would you ever say to your best friend where you failed? So give up. Don't you know? So get it. I said no. You'd encourage them. You'd support them, you'd do all those different things. So I think self compassion.
::The huge one for me it.
::You know, and it's a learned behaviour. I wasn't self compassionate towards myself, but that's something I've learned to do over the last few years more and more. And I think self-awareness, if you cannot be aware of your behaviours, your self talk.
::Of your own misgivings, because we all have them, and I have plenty of them. But I'm.
::Aware of them now so I can.
:: mentors in my life now since: ::And that is where for me, I think I'll always have coaches and mentors because I know that we do still fall. We do still stumble. We do still occasionally have those mined monkeys that try to derail us, but if you've got somebody else who can kind of help you and keep you accountable in those moments.
::And question your thought process.
::It can make.
::All the difference between you achieving your goals and maybe failing and quitting and giving up on them.
::I think that's really important to highlight. I think something that springs to my mind again.
::When we think.
::About patience and what that might look like for you. It's self compassion.
::Self-awareness. I couldn't agree more and something that you said that I kind of feel like it is a tool that we often misuse or this don't use enough. There's another word, but I've lost it. Don't use enough. We'll be fine.
::Is uh humour.
::Taking ourselves home desperately. Seriously. You know, you should have said it, but I've got my misgivings. And then you had a little chuckle. And actually sometimes, like you say, talking to a mentor or a coach, your best friend who might just draw out some of that. For me, being able to have a bit more of the the giggle about something that hasn't worked out or something that you.
::Know is a really strong, robust pattern inside you, but if you can be.
::Like well, gosh.
::But again, I've done it again. I think that in itself creates patience, which then creates a better outcome.
::Isn't it?
::Yeah, you're so right. And I look back and I took myself and took life so seriously. I, you know, everything I did was kind of military operation. Everything was always structured. And all of that. And I look back now and think, Oh my gosh, I was making life harder for myself.
::In every aspect and you know I'm in this phase of mid life, I'm in, you know, the season of menopause. I'm also now going through that.
::You know, kind of parenting the parent. I have a.
::90 year old Father, who I've just relocated 300 miles away to live literally three roads from me to make things easier.
::For him at.
::This this stage of life, and this could actually be the most serious and tough and hardest part of my life.
::But we're kind of just.
::Going through it a with some humour be with some compassion, but also just what is there to learn here. This is like, you know, embracing what's an incredible experience.
::But it does.
::Depend on your outlook. If you are always seeing everything as you know an obstacle.
::Or a A.
::Dead end, whatever it might be, then all those things that then you won't have the patience to kind of navigate it in that way. But if you learn that patience, if you learn that self compassion like you say.
::That humour it just makes everything a more.
::Ohh, pleasurable experience and that you know, life is meant to as you said it should be challenging. It should have all these ups and downs. It should be, you know, black and white one day and bright colours the next. That's the whole point. And I I now ride all those different waves and just you know.
::Even on the days where things haven't gone.
::The plan.
::It's fine. Tomorrow will be different. Tomorrow will be colourful and rainbows and everything else.
::But I think that's the problem, isn't it? So many people get caught in that spiral of it hasn't worked out. I'm not good enough. You might pick up all the other old stuff that's outdated. You don't need it anymore. But it still comes back because it's still in there, you know, that's the way the brain works. It's an association making machine, isn't it? So we're always looking for.
::That well. Ohh yeah. Well, it's that, isn't it? Or it's cause of that. And there's all these horrible old stories that come out. But I think just being able to.
::Go with the flow. You know. I know it's not as easy as just doing that, but I I love that idea of just being like, OK, what have I learned? What can I do differently next time but not to see it as a stop sign? Just see it as a.
::Bit of a.
::Speed bump to slow us down. Maybe to bring in the patients, maybe to pause.
::You think that's the thing that?
::Those things, to my mind, is worse and so desperately not wanting to feel that horrible feeling, whatever feeling it is. Whether it's sadness, whether it's anger, whether it's jealousy or whatever it is we don't want it to we we we spent all this time trying to stop ourselves feeling new.
::Feelings. They're normal, but in that trying to not do it, I think we make ourselves more and more miserable, don't we?
::Yeah, I couldn't agree.
::More and you know, it's only been these.
::Last few years that I realised that what I was trying to.
::Do or was.
:: Doing for: ::At all, and something I talk so much to my clients about is feel the emotions. It's OK to feel sad one day. It's OK to feel a little bit low. It's OK to feel all those things.
::It's natural to feel them, not to suppress them and numb them and hide them. It's it's why so many of us, few so many different.
::You know, different outlets to.
::Stop us from feeling those emotions, but they're there for a reason.
::They really are and they are there when people say, how do I get more confident? How do I have more self worth? How do I get better?
::Whatever. Whatever is he rhyming for, and actually people are thinking they're looking for something, but actually it's already here. It's just we've got all this other stuff sat on the top, whether that's impatience, whether that's lack of compassion, whether that's no serious, they've been very serious. It's.
::Here, isn't it?
::It actually is here and yes, we learn to grow and build on that. But I think that's something that it feels to me like there's lots of people out there who are looking for something as if it's going to.
::And actually what we're saying is sit with some difficult stuff because in there it's gonna come. It's gonna come from inside out.
::And it's so interesting you say that because I did a little bit of a a looking back today. I was, I'm I'm going on Instagram live tomorrow with a wonderful lady I met in Norway last year who's also a.
::Coach and I said to her.
::Do you know what I haven't done?
::An Instagram live in so long and.
::I looked back on my feed and it's two years ago and it was.
:: September: ::In 21 that I went on Instagram live for the first time.
::I wasn't confident it wasn't perfect and I set myself a challenge and I went live Monday to Friday every day for the whole month, and I remember people saying to me, I wish I had your confidence and people say it to me all the time now. If I had your confidence, I would XYZ.
::And I say to them, I didn't have confidence. It didn't come along on a bus. And you know, and kind of get off and come.
::To me, the only.
::Way you get it is by creating it. You've got to step into like you say, all those uncomfortable moments, all those times and things that you fear.
::You've got to.
::Step into them and.
::You'll reward is the confidence each time you the next thing and the next thing and the next thing it just grows. But if you're never prepared to get uncomfortable, which unfortunately I think is something that so many of us aren't prepared to do, and I know I wasn't.
::OK.
::You know, if I if I was cold, I'd put the heating on. If I was too hot, I'd put the air conditioning on. If I was a little bit hungry, I'd just buy myself snacks. You know, I cold water, swim throughout the whole of the you.
::Know the whole of the winter now.
::And some people say, why do you do it? Do you enjoy it? I don't enjoy it all the time.
::I do it.
::Because I choose the uncomfortable things now and it makes everything else in life a little bit easier, it's really important, isn't it? Something that strikes me there is making sure that individually for everyone that's listening.
::To this episode is whatever confidence.
::You are looking for is your kind of confidence. So I think something else that happens is we compare. So some people might see you and and me as well they think you know I'm up on a stage quite often. I'm this massively confident person and I can't be that but but you're not going to be that because that's not you that's not necessarily.
::Where you want to go. So I think when we're talking about how does it resonate, what's really tricky is to make sure that whatever it is for you, your success, your confidence, that's what you want to be aiming for, not worrying about what everyone.
::The statement.
::Yeah, absolutely. And I was that was a huge thing for me, I.
::Compared myself throughout school, throughout college, throughout.
::My career or and you know, and in friendship groups and everything, always comparing myself, always feeling like I was, you know that that terminology I was behind. I wasn't kind of where I should be. And over the last few years again.
::I've let go of that thought process of.
::You know I'm not where I should be or I should be further forward or they're doing this or I'm doing that and just embracing my journey and just seeing that everything that I'm doing as long as I am improving on where I was last week, last month, last year and like you say, that confidence is so different to everybody.
::It can be the smallest, smallest thing and.
::For me it was.
::You know, two years ago it was going on and doing an Instagram live. Now I don't even think twice.
::About, you know, going on live or talking to an audience or any of those things. But two years ago, that was a huge thing for me, and I think that's the other important thing is that start small, but starts somewhere, and then it just snowballs when you create that first bit of confidence. I always describe it to my clients as kind of almost like.
::Leaf stacking. Once you've got a little bit of belief in yourself, you go on and you do the next thing and you get the next bit of belief in.
::The next bit.
::Of belief and before you know it, you've.
::Created this belief. You've created this confidence. This could.
::Which, and you're more inclined to step out of your comfort zone more and more and more. Actually, for me it becomes so addictive. I now just feel like I I just don't want to be in a comfort zone anymore. I'm like, what's next? What's next? Where can I grow bit more? What, what? What challenge can I put?
::Myself through because.
::You know, the more you believe in yourself.
::The more belief you have to do other things.
::Yeah. And I think that's it. Isn't it? Like you say, it is in the word addictive, but in a positive way it it becomes something that you it becomes part of who you are, doesn't it? That you are somebody who doesn't necessarily stay small or stay stay easy. You start to think about what might be your next and and for everyone listening.
::Whatever your next is is absolutely perfect for you. Your next needs to still come with some patience. And what we're saying there is that means be self compassionate.
::Be able to take that little bit of time to think about your awareness. Be aware of what's happening and then bring in a bit of bit of fun. Let's stop being so serious as adults and and all of that will start to create that the movement, if we like the the, the little shifts that we're looking for and and the other thing that I always say.
::Which often gets missed is whatever your little shift.
::Is celebrate. Yeah. Celebrate this. Celebrate the small wins because they make.
::All the difference along the way.
::And I think something that you said at the beginning, which I think is really important is.
::When we yes, we can have some big goals no problem, but obviously if you're only focused on that, what another trap I see is that people then don't reward themselves for any of the effort getting there. And then if they don't actually get there, wherever there is, then they're just Downing themselves and it just feels they. They just feel very stuck.
::Yeah, absolutely. And then also when they fail at one goal.
::All they have this belief system that they'll fail at everything that they try and do so actually they stop trying at all, which is, you know, just so sad not to. Then go on and achieve what it is that they really.
::Really want to achieve.
::And I think what I often observe with people, and I've been in this space for nearly 30 years now.
::People who aren't doing that, so they're staying safe because they don't want to put themselves in control. But actually some of their sadness is coming from the fact that they're not actual.
::Reaching anything like their potential. So it's not even the fact that they it isn't even about the pushing. It's actually about the not doing, isn't it that the staying safe actually becomes the problem.
::Yeah, absolutely.
::And their sadness and their frustration and their even their anxiety. Depression can come from the fact that they're not doing it. I know people.
::Well, we've found something. Whatever their thing is, it might be dancing or singing or anything. Climbing more blank, whatever you fancy. And and in that they found so much more because they have pushed themselves. And I think that has to be our reminded, isn't it about how we get.
::This thing called confidence. We've gotta start in little ways. It doesn't just come on the bus.
::Absolutely. And it is so worthwhile. I was only, you know, sitting down and and doing a bit of reflection myself yesterday and just thinking the journey is, you know, and I know some people say ohh the journey the journey but the journey to getting to where you want to get to the learning the self discovery the self development the self growth.
::It is full of rewards along the way, as long as you're open to seeing them and learning from them and.
::You know, taking them that they are part of the journey, they're not the knockback. They're not, you know, you being unlucky, you know, that's another word that I hear so often when people say to me, you're so lucky to live by the sea. You're so lucky to do what you love. You're so lucky to have the relationship.
::You have with your dad.
::And behind the scenes, it's been a.
::Complete and utter.
::You know the best part of nine years to get to create the life, the relationships, the business, all those things that I've wanted to and and not just dreamt about them but decided to actually create them.
::But I think so often and and you know, again maybe a lot of this comes down to the world of social media. We see the after picture. We see the before and the after. We don't see the nine years. You know what? What do they say that you've you've entered me at Chapter 9? You didn't see me at chapter one and people just.
::Assume that that.
::Overnight, that overnight success story nobody wants to see the grit and the determination and the not backs and the it's why on social media I'm, you know, I really do share the behind the scenes of my journey because I want people to read.
::Lies, but it's not easy. It doesn't have to be difficult. It can be fairly simple if you've got the right tools and the right strategies, but it also is a real mix of emotions, and you've got to embrace that. The messiness, the chaos, the knockbacks, all those different sides of it. But when you get to that peak.
::That summit, and you look down and you look at what you've achieved and what you've put yourself through. There is no greater sense of pride.
::All of that, and I think it's so important, isn't it? You're you're sharing with us that you're digging?
::Keep your everything that you did to get here, which again I talk a lot about. You know what? I didn't arrive here either like this. It was a very bumpy ride. Lots of tears, lots of discomfort, lots of situations that I was putting myself in that were wrong for me.
::All the while trying to feel OK.
::So you're OK and you know everything that you do, even if it's things that haven't worked out, you did them at the time because you a you thought they were the right thing and B maybe it's just that you learned something new while you were there. And I think that's the that's the way to see it is. And I have some use the metaphor about sailing. You know, you if you go out on a mill.
::And in a sailing boat, would you learn how to sail? Not really. But if you go out and it's a bit windy and it's a bit choppy. Ohh boy, you'll learn how to sail there. You'll learn the hard way. You'll probably capsize, but you will learn how to navigate. And I think life is very much like that.
::Totally. Yeah. Always, always stormy seas.
::Always, always. But as long as you've.
::Got a nice big.
::Big pea on our sale with patients written on it and I think we can probably go much further. Brilliant. Ohh, thank you so much for coming and creating this episode with me. Normie, it's been absolutely brilliant and I feel sure.
::Yeah, absolutely.
::We can have lots of other conversations into the future.
::I'm sure we can. Thanks so much for having me, Allison. It's been wonderful.
::Thank you. OK, so in next week's episode, we have got Kirsty Knight and Kirsty Knight are going to talk about the work life balance. So hope you can.
::Join me then.
::Thank you for listening and sharing in this episode of Mental Wealth. Remember, you can subscribe wherever you get your podcast.
::My last question to you is what is the one small thing that you can take action on from this episode? Message.
::Me on Instagram.
::Or through our website with questions you'd like.
::Me to explore.
::The links in the show.
::Notes. I'll be back with more tools and tips to make sense of your mind in the next episode. In the meantime, be kind to yourself. Bye for now.
